Brothers And Sisters
by triffickie
Summary: It's just another night for the Turks. Stars over the Plate... Inside the good bad guys' minds. [POV's]
1. Veracious Lies // Rude's Ponders

Veracious Lies// Rude's Ponders Veracious Lies   
by Fivil 

_A/N + Disclaimer: I was bored, needed to fix my mind something and since I hadn't written any fanfiction lately, I started to think about Rude.. Then I just wrote. Rude, Shinra, Turks and the whole FF7 World are owned and copyrighted to Squaresoft, not me. Rated PG-13 for the naughty mouth of Rude and Reno. Might suggest any pairings, basicly. So might also suggest yaoi. But isn't! ^^; _

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Booze. Alcohol. The drug of the wisest and the most idiotic. I didn't give a shit tonight. Morals were different down in the smoky bars of the nasty underworld. I'm not going to make it all sound really goddamn dramatic or glamorous. I'm not going to say anything about what I think of all the shitheads who make big money in Midgar, nore am I going to say anything about the shitheads who make big money in the underground Midgar. They're different worlds, but the whole game's basically the same. Survival of the most cunning. You don't need to be witty, you just need to be an asshole. Put all emotions aside. 

My friends weren't being very cunning tonight. Lane, or should I call her Elena since we work together and shit, was just giggling on her chair, very drunk. She would've been a special prey among these drunken bastards just wanting to get high and get laid, but in her navy-blue uniform she wasn't exactly a catch. Every man in this bar feared her. Not many women had been in her shoes, worked as Turks. Fuck, even I feared her. Lane had never fought seriously. She just acted like she was serious, but I knew she had more power than she cared to show. I didn't care, as long as she didn't deceive the Turks. And Lane wasn't that stupid. 

Reno wouldn't deceive the Turks either. It was the only thing this poor excuse for human held on to. His profession, his job. That dirty, ragged uniform was his most priced possesion along with his weapon. We're the same, Reno and I. Or that's what he always makes me believe. Brother to a brother. Our endless conversations on money, work, romance and sex. If someone shot Reno they might as well shoot me too. Brothers. Turks 'til the end. 

Yeah, right. I feel sorry for Reno. He used to be such a lively feller. He wasn't out to hunt down people who didn't believe in Shinra, he had faith in something else. I don't know what that something is, but somewhere along the way, during the 10 years I've worked alongside with this man, he lost it. He never got it back, it left an empty hole inside of him and now he's filled the spot with some immoral shite the old Reno didn't appreciate. I don't feel like analysing it any further. I just saw what I saw. Or maybe I just think I saw it. 

The problem with people is that we see so many lies, so many stories that we forget that life itself ain't a folks' tale, twisted in the mouths of strangers. Nore are we living in a huge play. If life is supposed to be real, why do people just pretend, lie and deceit? 

Maybe life's just more fun that way. 

I'm not preaching. I fucking hate people who do that. It's not up to me to decide what other people's lives should be like. I just can't make out my own, either. I talked to Lane about this once. She has a really fucking positive outlook on life. It's like all birds and sunshine to her. Maybe she's faking, girls are good in that. Maybe I'm just jealous of her world. Her world's the same as mine, but she just sees different things. She doesn't see the rotten society, she sees all the good things that she holds dear to herself. Fucking hell, Lane. How do you do it? 

Oh great, she's passed out and Reno's trying to carry her. I just follow. I don't say a word. I've got nothing to say. Reno's bitching about something. I don't listen. I usually do. Not right now. The stars on the skies... 

"For fuck's sake, Rude! Would you look at her now!" 

Lane's down on the ground, on her knees, puking and crying. She's sobbing out words, Reno lights up a cigarette and ignores her. 

"Elena, told you not to drink that vodka, but you just never listen to me! It's your own fault." he says and blows the smoke out. It disappears slowly in the air against the dark blue sky. The stars... 

Elena's up again, she tries to hit Reno but falls over again. Reno laughs and picks her up. She starts to cry again. I glance at the sky. To just get away... Far away... 

"We should do this another time." 

"We do it too many times" Lane sobs and wraps her arms around Reno. I don't understand Lane sometimes. 

'You never think of girls, do you?' was the first question Reno asked me after we had worked together as the new generation Turks for the first week. I always think of girls, was my reply, meant as a joke. I didn't know what love was, perhaps it was the opposite of solitude. I knew what solitude was. 

"Lane, are you coming onto me?" 

"You wish." 

One of the stars is shining intensively. Is it Jupiter maybe? I don't know about astrology. 

"Hey Rude, let's go. Got some work to do tomorrow." 

"You don't work, Reno, you bum around." 

"Your tongue is so sharp, slashing me so hard I'm bleeding, Elena." 

"Thank you. Bum." 

"RUDE! C'mon!" 

I just stare at Reno for a while. 'If I'd die, would you die with me?' my eyes asks him. His eyes don't answer. They used to answer. Right away they would communicate, response to my look, tell me he felt exactly the same.. 

...But no longer was it like that. Reno was a fading memory of the Reno that once was. Elena wasn't fading, I hoped. She had everything in her. It was no time to get all sobby, but I just felt like crying. 

Cry. For fuck's sake.. No tears. No tears left to cry, I had wept them all a long time ago. Elena looked at me. 

"Let's go, Rude.. Come on.." she begged. 

I took a step, another. And so we walked on. It was all too scary for us to stay put. It was all too scary to think, to become fragile for one moment. 

Brothers and Sisters. Turks 'til the end. Minute too long and we'd be shattered. We didn't want that. Underground Midgar leaves it's scars, so does the bittersweet life on the Plate. I didn't care. Not tonight. 

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Feedback is appreciated. Thru e-mail or thru AIM : vera punkfield is my screen name. Thank yous. ^.^ 


	2. Insane Healthy // Reno's Condition

Insane Healthy // Reno's Condition 

by Fivi/ Vera Priscaleth 

_A/N + Other Crap:_ The title clears up when you read the story.. As for my portrait of Reno, I admit, it is a little wacked up and weird than the usual fanfic characterisation of him. The Turks belong to Squaresoft, this story using them belongs to me. Feel free to send feedback, review or just comment.   
_Rating/Pairings:_ PG-13 and not gonna tell ya =) 

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The smoke fills the air and I'm used to it. In fact, this smoky, stinking air that lacks of oxygen is easier for me to breathe than the fresh air that breathes in the summer mornings, fresh sea breeze. But nevermind the poetic ways of speech, it's lost among these drunk fools. We never respect a man who comes to a bar to preach about our worthless lives, it's a lost cause. This is our way to live, our way to be. Fuck anyone who thinks different. There is no other way. 

All my life my feelings and thoughts have been shadowed by people who have put me down. I'm not offering the usual tragic childhood, rebellious teenager-pattern. I'm just saying. My family, what a waste they were. Never giving me the chance to decide for myself, never supporting any ideas of my own. My so-called friends were the same. I don't mind, they've only made me me, but it's a waste of thought thinking what I could've become. There's no real drama, there's just a bunch of broken hearts, broken promises, broken dreams and a puppy, that bled in my hands. You do the math of what I have become. I've always lacked of imagination, besides on the "101-ways-to-kill-a-person-with-a-spoon" type way. 

Speaking of talented killers, Rude seemed all gloomy tonight. The poor fucker's been thinking too much. He just gets so caught up with himself. That never happens to me. And Lane, our rookie-Turk, our blonde bitch, our giggling sidekick, the sweet sugar in our bitter morning coffee. Elena, I curse her name. She's pissed as hell, sitting next to, trying to stub out my cigarette in my beer, laughing, teasing me. I bet she'd love to know how much it really makes me suffer. I glance at Rude. In his own world, thinking, pondering. I bet Rude's got a million characters inside his head, talking, arguing and discussing. He has a hard time. Just alone with himself, I guess. He drowns it all in alcohol, as do I. Neither of us give a shit. 

Otherwise, well, I think Rude needs me. More than anyone else. He think he's all strong and that, but he never talks about his feelings or his pain or about anything. He just tells me the name of the bar and we go. And I shut up, yet my mouth speaks words and he laughs and we're vulgar and absurd in our own patheticness, and we're loving it. Booze, women, gambling, drugs, sex, our job.. The circle seems never ending, but I know someday it will break and we will all lose our touch. 

Elena orders another shot. I wish I could just tell her to stop, but I was the one suggesting this, so if she's going down, I'm going done with her. I'm a loser, I can't stop myself from being this sad actor, numbed my other peole's ignorance, now never wanting to reveal the person inside. She can never hear what my mind speaks. I am a human, but what I really am is scum. I know it, I put up with it, I live like it. I kill, I murder, I blackmail, I have no morals and yet my morals require me to live like this. Elena giggles at me loudly, but then her smile turns into a frown. She says nothing, but I know it is time to go. 

Rude stares at her blankly. I try to tell him to wipe his face, a casual joke, come on, man, get it? But nothing in his expression changes, he doesn't hear me. Elena orders another drink. I ignore her for a while now. It's a decision I usually make when I see I can't control things. Only a few minutes after my mind started to repeat blank thoughts as I began to not pay attention to her, a slack body begins to rest up against me. She hasn't gone to romantic slumberland, she's passed out, alcohol poisoning, irrigation, death, panic. Definately time to leave this place behind for tonight. I put her arm around my neck, she stands up on her own, probably sobering up. 

I began to carry her. It's not that difficult, but it's difficult enough without Rude's help. The-- fucking bastard. 

"Rude, come the fuck on and help me. She's not a bloody feather, y'know." I shout. 

My mind doesn't reflect back every curse word I use now. I'm glad. I don't need----- my stupid sub-conscious mind telling me anything right now. 

"For fuck's sake, Reno! Would you look at her now!" I shout at him. He ignores me, stares at the sky. What the hell is the---- motherfucker thinking about now? Wake up from your goddamn fantasy world, brudda, we need to get things done. I'm getting so angry I happen to drop Lane on the ground. She moans from pain and curses under her breath. What the hell is her----- problem? I feel like beating up Rude, the fucker's ignorant and------ distant at the moment. I hate people when they get like that. I hate people who get all pathetic when they're drunk. I look down----- on Elena, I feel like spitting on her. She's throwing up, puking inches away from my shoes. 

"Elena, I told you not to drink that vodka, it's your own fucking fault." ---I say. 

Rude glances at her and warmth radiates from his eyes. The poor gorilla, if you love her------ so much, why don't you just shag her right away? ----Huh? 

Lane's sobbing out words.. I can hear one or two, but I'm upset and decide to ignore-- everything she says. I light up a cigarette, maybe it'll calm------ me down, because right now I feel like shooting this--- whole lot. My hands.. I don't need my gun right now.. I don't.. Lane... 

I'm feeling closer to earth now. It was just a phase, no, more like a seizure, it goes by, don't worry.. I wouldn't really do anything like that to anyone, I swear, I wouldn't. It's just not me, it isn't, it goes by, it's gone now, I'm alright. Elena, I wouldn't do that to you, Rude.. I'm sorry... 

"Damn you!" her nearly-sober voice shrieks and her small fist waves somewhere close to my face, but in the end she's down again. I laugh and pick her up. She smiles a little, humiliated. She cocks it up, once again. Way to go, Lane, you're the screwed up queen of my world again. 

Then she burts into tears, her big eyes glittering with water. I feel something inside me move. I wish it didn't move like that. I wish I could just... 

"We should do this another time." I say. It was a stupid thing to say, I know. Rude's still staring at the star-filled sky. He looks like he wants to go far away. I know how he feels. I just know, and it hurts. 

"We do it too many times", Lane says. She moves closer and puts her arms around me. It comforts me. I hope it comforts her as well. I want to care. I wish to be there. I really do. And she's right. We do this too often. It had made us sore, vulnerable, yet rough and ragged. Walked through hell and still walking on. 

"Lane, are you coming onto me?" I ask, as a joke. I wish she was. I wish we could, just for once, throw it all away and just fuck. Get it out of our system. Do what we want. For once. 

"You wish." is her reply. Yeah, bitchy as usual. Not cold, though. Teasing, provocating. 

She looks into my eyes. I look into hers. A smile, a mild one, her shyness coming through. I guess it was supposed to be a touching moment, but all of the sudden it got all awkward and we let go of each other. There is no time for affectionate emotions. Elena gives me a strick look. I nod. Work comes first. I'm still a little drunk, I think. All humour is drained away. 

"Hey Rude, let's go. Got some work to do tomorrow." I turn away. My body stiffens up as I walk. Lane follows. I hope Rude does as well. He's caught up in his emotions again. Rude's eyes glued to the sky, I'm too afraid to look back at him. 

"You don't work, Reno, you bum around." Lane shoots at me. I glance at her - challence emanates from her eyes. I don't really feel like putting up with her shit right now. She can be annoying, so very annoying. 

"Your tongue is so sharp, slashing me so hard I'm bleeding, Elena." I shoot back at her. I don't give a shit, I wish she'd just see that. Stupid--- bitch. 

"Thank you. Bum." she says, seeing she won't find her bashing-opponent tonight from me. The little-- annoying.. Sweet Christ no, don't let me do anything hazardous or hurting to my dear little blond sweetness... Goddamnit, Rude.. 

"RUDE! C'mon!" I shout. He moves his eyes away from the sky, right at mine. We stare at each other, his eyes are telling me something, but mine won't reply. For a moment I feel like a hollow shell, an empty core, with no use. We don't see things the way we used to, we don't, Rude. Neither of us. Elena's eyes seem to be watering. 

"Let's go, Rude.. Come on.." she begs. I sigh. Yes, Rude, come with us. We have no hope left here, we've got no hope nowhere. So let's go. Let's just leave. 

He takes a step forward, then another. I feel relieved. I glance at the sky, the stupid, huge, dark sky and keep walking. 

Brothers and Sisters. Turks 'til the end. I know I won't live for long, I know none of us will. But we don't care. We just want to go on, try to hold on to our small shreds of life. Insecure, fucked up, insane, unsure and carrying our weapons like they were the most sacred possesions to us. We dream awake. 

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The ---- markings mean that this is when Reno's, err, another, more violent, less human, more cruel version becomes the dominating part of him. Just wanted to clear that out. Anyway, comments, suggestions..? Elena's POV will be coming up. Be patient. 


	3. Useful Waste // Elena's Requiem

**Useful Waste**

By Vera Priscaleth

_Disclaimer : Elena, the Turks and Midgar belong to Squaresoft, not me. This is FANfiction, just a tribute._

_A/N: Final chapter of my Turks-trilogy called "Brothers And Sisters". I do consider this series the best series I've written and all of these stories one of the best pieces of fanfiction and fiction in general that I've written. I'm proud, but I do understand I can evolve, so send me thoughts and ideas, comments and constructive criticism. This chapter is from Elena's POV. You don't need to read the other parts of "Brothers and Sisters" in order to understand "Useful Waste", but if you liked this, you'll like those as well. So do also read Insane Healthy and Veracious Lies. _

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I could feel the heat that night. The smoke, the talk, the clinks of the glasses hitting together. It was a calm, yet aggressive environment and I felt like it was home. No, I didn't know everyone in this lousy joint they dare call a bar. I didn't know a single person here. I didn't even know myself.  Still this was my home, my place and my unfortunate playground. I didn't think I'd end up here, but hell, I ain't judging anyone. It's like Rude taught me; there's underground and the common folk and the rich bastards. The underground and the rich bastards play the same game, dirty rules and it could cost you your life, but you play it anyway. The common folk know, but they stay away. For their own safety, naturally. I could've stayed away too, you know. I could've become a shopkeeper, a showgirl, a cleaning lady, anything. 

And I don't know why I decided to come here, among the sly underground people and the vicious rich folk. We're in between, working for the rich folk and interfering the underground. It was exciting. Maybe that's why.

I was slightly hyper again that night. It happens when I take a little alcohol. I always decide I'm not going to drink, but then Reno offers me one and since I love this cheery, happy state of mind alcohol always gets me to, I take another, and another. Before I know it I'm giggling, cracking up jokes and poking at my fellow Turks. I'm taking it day by day and today it's my day and I'm living it to the limit. At least I hope I am. 

Leaving aside all negative thoughts, I glance at Reno smoking a cigarette, glaring at Rude, who is a million miles away. Rude is so distant at times, you just can't tell what he's thinking. But he is a wonderful person, I just know it. And he has so much faith in me. He's like a big brother to me, a truly special person.

They both are. I am a part. And I love being a part of this. I can't do some things, but we can do anything. Together. Yet we stand alone, we carry our own burdens and we cannot rely on each other on everything. 

I love to mess with Reno. I try to stub out his cigarette and throw it to his beer, but I fail miserably as he notices my actions. I giggle and he gives me a sarcastic smile. For a second there I detect some kind of sadness in his eyes, but then it's gone and his eyes are empty again. He looks at Rude and takes a sip of his beer. The moment is swished away. And I feel lonely. 

"Another one, please," I tell the waiter and she glances at me with pity. The story of my life seems complete now. I have sunk deep down and I have no one. No friends, no family, no lover. I gulp down my shot. Reno glances at me, I grin at him. I'm disappointed of him, of Rude, of the whole goddamn system and mostly, of myself. My head weights a ton and I feel sleepy. What if I'd just die here, huh? How would you like that? How would you? Rude has his arms folded on the table, behind his glass and his face doesn't let me know anything. I'm still giggling, sometimes silently, sometimes a little louder. What am I faking? Why am I faking? Suddenly I don't feel like it anymore.

I think of myself as a ship. Fuck no, of course I don't look at myself and see a ship, I'm just fucking drunk and need a half-decent metaphor. Alright, so here goes nothing. I sail from an island to another. I ran into storms, I get off-course. I sail to an odd island. But while on the dock, I fall in love with the strange isle so much I decide to stay. And while I stay, my ship slowly submerges in the dock. 

While thinking about the ship-thing, my vision turns blurry and I decide it's best if I close my eyes. Soon I'm knocked out by my own pathetic, drunk state. And I loathe myself so deeply. I let things get out of hand, because I wish someone would be there to say something. Elena, stop it. Elena, don't do that. Elena, let me help you. The reasons I left home in the first place are the reasons I want back. I can't handle it out here. I'm weak. Someone save me. Anyone. 

Reno carries me. Well, sort of. He supports me. But not for long. 

I fall, the ground is damp and cold and hard. I moan, and once again my vision is blurred, this time by tears. I curse and whine, Reno ignores me, I want to kill him, I don't feel like that often, but right now I really could.

All the sickness is released on the ground. I just keep throwing up and my eyes are pouring as well. It's embarrassing.

"For fuck's sake, Rude! Would you look at her now!" Reno's disgusting voice says. I feel like passing out, letting go. I struggle, for this one time only, I promise myself.

"Elena, I told you not to drink that vodka, it's your own fucking fault." Reno couldn't be more right, I have to admit. And I feel so pointless being there. I'm convinced my life will end so very soon and he'll be there to witness it and he'll be so sorry he ever said that to me, he'll be so sorry he never…

"…loved me." I sob out the last words of the sentence on my mind. I feel even more pathetic. He doesn't hear me. Naturally. 

And I wonder where Rude is. But no, of course he wouldn't care. Why should he? I'm so disgusted by myself I decide to get up and kick Reno's balls in. Just for fun. The ground is shaky and my vision is a little blur, but I can see the smoke from Reno's cigarette and his navy-blue suit and Rude's dark glasses and his big figure in the background, staring into the starry sky. I feel close with him, but right now, I just want to punch the both of them.

"Damn you!" I shriek and direct my punch somewhere close to his face. I don't hit him, I just happen to loose my balance and fall on the ground again. Reno laughs. Yes, it is kind of funny. I am a mess up. A screw up. He helps me up. 

But I have to let it out. Suddenly, at the most inappropriate moment, I burst into tears. And I feel so useless again. Just like before. Nothing has changed, I'll still jump off a cliff and I still have that nasty way of seeing myself in the mirror and I'll still… Still… 

 "We should do this another time." Reno's words struck me and I take my hands off my face. He's looking at Rude, who's staring into the night sky. For a moment I look at the sky as well. It feels wonderful, promising. Out there, out there somewhere, there's everything and anything and we're just down here. And I want to be away. Just be away. I sniffle.

"We do it too many times," I say and move closer to Reno's comforting form. His cigarette is slowly burning between his fingers and his expression is soft. I wrap my arms around his waist and just hold him like that. It feels comforting. We're one right now. Not just us two, but Rude also. The three of us. Against anything. He puts his arms around me as well. The warmth.

"Lane, are you coming onto me?" he asks, grinning. A small part of me begins to shake nervously. The rest of me is calm. Concerned maybe, but calm.

"You wish," is my automatic reply. I'm unreachable, the ice-princess, the ball queen without her king. She needs no king. She wants no king.

But I look at Reno and for a moment, a second maybe, there is something. A connection, a bond, a click. It's almost frightening, but it's also strangely wonderful. I don't feel like such a stranger anymore. I smile a little. His eyes widen; this sharp look that cuts through me. I'm nearly scared. I love this man. With a huge contradiction. 

We let go, it's what we have to do. I clear my throat and give him a look. Business is business. We do business. 

"Hey Rude, let's go. Got some work to do tomorrow." Rude doesn't seem to notice Reno's words, but still Reno decides to walk away. I follow him, silent, small steps into the unknown. Rude doesn't follow us. I don't look back on him, I just can't. I try to ease the tension.

"You don't work, Reno, you bum around."

An obvious mistake I was willing to make. He'll hate me for it and I don't care. 

"Your tongue is so sharp, slashing me so hard I'm bleeding, Elena," follows Reno's sarcastic response. I wasn't in the mood, neither was he. Topic discussed, time to retire. A thought of eternal retirement, letting go, slipping away, crossed my mind… I shake it away. Fast.

"Thank you. Bum." And that is the end of that conversation. My biggest concern was nine feet behind us. 

"RUDE! C'mon!" Reno shouts at him. Rude wakes up from his long trance and they share an intense look. Reno seems to feel chills going down his spine, and he shakes a little. I stir and take action. Rude needed to come with us. Now. I feel fragile and scared. My vision is blurred by tears and my voice is only slightly louder than a whisper…

"Let's go, Rude.. Come on.." I beg silently. We had to leave, didn't he understand? 

He takes a step forward, another. On six feet we continue our journey towards nowhere.

Brothers and Sisters. Turks 'til the end. And we'll encounter others and they will not understand. No one will. We don't understand either, that's what's so strange about it. We think too much, we think too little. We fight and try to settle ourselves, make peace with our own raging minds. Life is not a battle, we don't know what life is. We destroy ourselves, we save each other. So maybe that's why we keep going. We fear.

_No need to worry I am just another monster. In you, I'll see me, in the secret show…_

**AFI ~ of greetings and goodbyes**


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